Monday morning pop quiz

Imagine that there's a bridge bridge over which traverses a quarter of the commerce between the U.S. and its biggest trading partner. To pass it, fuel trucks and hazardous material trucks, uninspected by any government agency, need only pay a toll to the reclusive 79-year-old billionaire who single-handedly owns it.

Let's say this proverbial troll under the bridge has been described as a "one-man lawyer employment act" who has made it the focus of his few remaining life on this earth fighting lawsuits to keep himself immune from any government agency. Imagine, say, that the customs officials complaint that securing the bridge is the transportation officials responsibility, and that transportation officials say it's the customs official responsibility; and that every releveant law enforcement agency has no better idea who's in charge, either.

Imagine, too, that government officials of any sort aren't allowed on the bridge to inspect it. Oh, and that the structure's 78 years old. Also, for good measure, pretend that officials only recently got authority to even read the company's own inspection records.

Imagine - just pretend! - that one of the troll's hirelings, when asked why this state of affairs should be allowed to continue six years after suicide terrorists killed 3,000 Americans, answered by ventriloquizing Ronald Reagan: "Some people believe only government can do these things. And that's the real issue at hand, is, Should government build this bridge or should private industry build it?"

Imagine, too - indulge me the flight of fancy - that if not-so-clever terrorists realized that this here bridge was just the place for the next attack, they would be responsible overnight for costing the Michigan and Ontorio economies $3 billion a month.

Here's the quiz:

Would an American "wartime president" ever let such a situation exist under his steely-eyed watch?

Here's the answer key:

Does Dolly Parton sleep lying on her back? [1]

Read a quietly angry profile of the troll in question from the Commie pinkos at Forbes magazine here [2],